Folks,
Wine here and I am still trying to figure out what just happened earlier today. So I’ve posted about The Hood Internet before but the other day I signed up to be an extra in a music video they were making to go along with a 7 inch they’re doing with Kid Static. Well in true Whiskey and Wine fashion, it’s time for a mother f-ing live blog, because this was all kind of absurd. Here’s the detailed email I received with the details for today’s shoot:
Awesome. Just meet us at 410 North Michigan Avenue, Chicago, IL at 8AM.
Some of us will be wearing bright orange shirts, so just look out for that.
Ryan
7:50am: Arriving outside of the Wrigley Building downtown, I realize that my usual promptness isn’t a quality these DJ’s and video people and what I assume will be throngs of hipsters who also signed up share but regardless I’m pretty giddy with excitement so I may have walked a little quickly after getting off of the train…
7:53am: My suspicions are confirmed and the only person I find in the place described is a security guard who has no idea about what I’m talking about but threatens me for some reason that I better have my permit in place to film…blah blah blah
7:55am: Caffeine consumption begins and I take up a perch on a planter awaiting these orange shirted people or other people (probably from Wicker Park) that will co-star with me in the nebulous role of “extra”.
8:05am: There’s one other guy with an abnormal amount of bags and things around him sitting about 5 feet to my right that I have done a good job of ignoring but hark! I glimpse an orange t-shirt and approach him awkwardly fully expecting to be denied any answers but lo and behold I find the producer aka Ryan.
8:06-8:15am: Making small talk until the cameras and the “guys” arrive. Also find out that I’m the ONLY extra to show up today…does this mean I’ll actually be in the video for more than just a crowd shot?! You could say that…
He explains the treatment of the video:
“This takes place in the future when Chicago is trying again to get the Olympics in 3016 and the guys will be taking part in a few events such as extreme ironing, wife carrying, boxing, etc. and you’ll be a part of the crowd basically cheering them on and whatever.”
Hmmmmmmm….
8:16am: Steve and Aaron aka ABX and STV SLV aka The Hood Internet turn the corner looking generally cool/tired. My heart jumps a bit and I remind myself over and over to NOT sing some of their mash-ups that I may or may not have been waking myself up with on the train…this proves to be harder than I thought.
8:20-9:35am: I get my first assignment from Ryan: Go out with Nick and Jac and a handheld to get the good citizens of Chicago to hold up “Chicago 3016” t-shirts and look excited. I may have been on some sort of drug or just reverting back to the days spend making videos for a capella groups but I leave whatever sense of shame I had left back with my headphones at the Wrigley Building and go chase people and talk them into being filmed. Here’s a sampling of the cast of characters we convince to be on video:
– Two Japanese tourists who were generally confused
– Yuppies on a smoke break
– A Dachshund hound who we were able to get the shirt on over it’s argyle sweater vest but only after it almost darted out in front of a bus
– A well-groomed homeless man who turned out to be the only compensated member of the video shoot
– A choir from Alabama and their families who didn’t fully understand the concept and really thought Chicago was getting the Olympics in 3016 and who were having a tourist aneurysm being asked to be in a music video while waiting to take a group photo by the Bean
9:45am: We arrive triumphantly back at base camp where THI and Kid Static are finishing a scene and looking odd in their tracksuits and aviators.
10:00am: This is the moment I take my self-respect and drop kick it back to Ohio. Ryan is going over some shots we have to do and getting them in order of importance, stops, looks at me and asks, “OK, I will totally do this one, but we want Kid Static to autograph your tongue” I agree without hesitation, alarmingly, before being told it’s not toxic.
10:01-10:30am: I mentally prepare to have a man grab my face and use a washable marker to sign my tongue in the midst of all of the tourists on Michigan Ave while the three stars do a few takes walking down the sidewalk doing typical rap video hand gestures to the music being played from some portable speakers. I give up saying I’m an extra at this point and act like a part of the crew when people come over to ask what’s going on. I feel (self) important.
10:40am: IT’S GO TIME! We find the right placement, I’m handed paper towels to dry off my tongue because Ryan (who practiced on himself and assures me I won’t die) says the marker shows up better that way. My scene goes as follows: I, with my tongue already out and ready to be tagged, wave emphatically towards Moses (Kid Static’s real name…yeah we’re “tight” now) who walks over, craddles my head gently as he writes “KS”, admires his work and walks away, I then break to the camera and gesture wildly (read: awkwardly, embarrassingly, stupidly, etc) toward the camera as it ZOOMS IN on my tongue. After the second take I decide I never want to see this video…ever.
11:00am: My tongue is restored back to it’s normal color and it’s time to shoot some more shots around the Wrigley Building cheering the band on as they warm up and shadowbox and look goofy. Meanwhile we enlist the services of trio of street brass musicians to be in a shot and dance while Moses raps into the camera.
11:30am: The last shot I’m in includes standing up on ledges and realizing that, while my sense of shame may be gone forever, my acute fear of falling to my death is not.
11:31am: Camera’s rolling. Fear of falling gone. Be sure to watch me jump around and make hand gestures I remember frat guys making at intermural sporting events while being an inch away from falling…
12:20pm: Everyone’s pretty tired and realizing THI have a show to get to, so I take my leave and one of the t-shirts we used for the shoot as some sort of souvenir because after all I will never ever watch this video…ever.
Yeah, so there you have it. I was in a music video today. I’m tired. My tongue feels violated.
-Wine
Whiskey, Wine, and Moonshine 